Tuesday, November 13, 2012

To dance with a beginner

In different discussions the combination advanced/beginner dancer is promoted as an ideal. Sometimes I find it as an expression for greed in tango context, when the beginners try to get in to a Ferrari for a fast development. Other times the leaders, it is mostly leaders in this case, want to make a good impression to the readers by announcing their generosity in this way.

The dance skill is also more seen as a Beauty kind of quality instead of a Skill for example in skiing. The first one is a static one - you got your share and that's it.There are feelings of rejection and frustration, when your goals are far a way from your place today. Only few are using these negative feelings as fuel to grow their skill.

When I compared the dance situation to a conversation I clearly understood the difference between the appreciation for a person and the skill level.

An enjoyable dance is not only about chemistry between the partners but it's a lot of about skill too! There can be a totally wonderful person but if s/he can only 10 words of our shared language there wouldn't be a conversation.

If s/he knows 2000 word but is unexperienced, our conversation is still a struggle with the language, our communication tool.

But when we know our grammar, we know the words and we have the flow after many years of use of this language, then we can forget the tools and focus on our subject. Sometimes this kind of conversation is so intense, the exploring so focused on what is within us, me and the partner - we just forget everything else!